the fifty year old virgin….so to speak

I’ve been busy. That’s good. I’ve been so un-busy the last few months, that I haven’t gotten anything done. I know that sentence doesn’t make sense, but for me it’s true. The less I have to do, the less I accomplish. “Too much time and not enough to do in it,” is how the phrase should read for me. I tend to procrastinate when I don’t have much to do.

The last few weeks have been a blur, but a lot’s happened and I have gotten a lot done.

1. I’ve moved
2. Helped someone else move
3. Drastically reworked my resume
4. Started working a on decent paying project (is decent the right word here?)
5. Started catching up on films
6. Learned two new computer programs
7. Read a lot
8. Written some
9. I saw Don for the first time in six years

Not bad for a month, especially if you look at the preceding one. I’m not trying to brag or say it’s been a perfect four weeks, it’s just a start.

I feel bad about not posting anything of substance on this blog for a while now. As Steph said in When They Leave, “Can somebody else be me for a while? I need a break.” I’ll have to admit that I have felt that way for several months now.

http://www.courier-journal.com/apps/pbcs.dll/article?AID=/20051220/NEWS02/512200397/1025/ARCHIVES

http://www.millermosterrobbins.com/visitations/View.php?id=78

After Judy died, I slumped into a dreadful despair. I felt like I had been drawn into some cruel cataract and no matter how hard I tried, I could neither find the surface nor air to breathe. (Of course my Ptown adventure didn’t help my mood much either.) I’ve tried to hide it from my friends, mostly they’ve said they don’t notice, but I think they’re just being nice. I have tried to remind others to be positive about their lives, hoping that advice will stick with me. I’ve really felt more like Polonius and have often feared that I will soon be found behind the curtain. I also figured if I didn’t write here I would give fewer clues to the curtain I was behind. To quote Steph again, “I feel like I’m lying by omission.” (sic)

So now I’m busy again and trying to catch up on my omissions. I hope I have enough time.